what is love

I fell in love many times.

But most of them didn't work well.

I know I'm not that "friendly". I'm a shy person and sometimes disconnected to the outer world (alias cuek banget). I'm also not that good looking, even considered myself uglier now, the triple chins, flabby tummy, and acne scars all over my face so, it became much harder.

Last time was on clerkship years. It was not a love love honestly, but more like a sweetener in hunger games arena lol. And yes, both (I know) flunked out. Again, I said. I was depressed back then and ugly and messed up inside and outside.

Now, I don't know. Makin tua makin ngerasa, yaudahlahmaugimanalagi. Besides, marriage is hard tho. Personally I think this is the advantages for me to enjoying my single mingle life. Having two older sisters even makes it worse (nah kidding, jadinya banyak belajar dari pengalaman-pengalaman mereka).

Tapi, jatuh cinta asik juga. Udah lama ga ngerasain. Emang kalo lagi bad days nyesek, but when good days come, it feels like, you motivate me to do many things that I've never wanted to do on normal days. 

So, I'm trying to keep it safe and sound *wink*

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

*p.s.: happy 14 years of blogging! iya tau udah tua!